its not stalking. its research.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Randomize
