yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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