bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
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