I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
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