the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Randomize