put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
