Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
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