Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
