i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
