yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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