Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Mom said you looked used
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
