North Korea, Best Korea!
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Randomize
