Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
