How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize