this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I am spending my child support on dildos
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
