wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
