i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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