i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
