There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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