I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize