How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
