im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I need a burrito and a hug.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize