i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
