people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
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