I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
