Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
