btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
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