just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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