Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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