Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
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