ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Randomize
