Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
