I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
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I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
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