Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I'm just crazy horny about you
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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