Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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