Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
50% drunk capacity currently
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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