she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
The feeling are messing with the penis
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
