There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
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