D3 body, D1 cock
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
there is glitter all over my balls
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