margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
She said her name was "party"
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
