did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Randomize
