whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
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I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
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anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
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