I want you more than these girls want KFC
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Randomize