you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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