omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
You ate ashes out of my bong
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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