Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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