he wants to bone in the snuggie
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
