He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
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