Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Randomize
