i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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