The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
